A Matter of Time

You are my sunshine


I was searching for You Are My Sunshine. This is the first 'song' this morning, which rings from the alarm clock, and this is the message I hear this morning, and the Sunshine I see this morning and the emotion I have this morning, and the answer I have this morning.

I was inspired, full of inspiration, happiness, joy and delight.

Just as I was listening to the songs, choosing the songs to be put up at the blog, this song, he responded,"why this song like that, so eerie?" and this is where I started writing. He is my inspiration as well.

However, thinking, typing, seeing, I yawned and yawned. So many thoughts, so many things to write, don't know where to start and don't know how to compose a structured and orderly writing presentable, I 'wasted' time 'thinking'.

It was a natural body response. I yawned and tears flood my eyes too. This time he asked,"Why" and I said,"I yawned" and He said,"Flu?" No, it is natural body response. I woke up with my eyes little 'puffy' as I cried, on Saturday, 530pm when I went to church, and on that night, I was not able to sleep, similarly for Ricsson and Clara (I closed my eyes, but were conscious). Last night, had a good sleep, and this morning, surprise, surprise. Left eye dry, right eye wet and tear shed when I yawned. How funny and how miraculous our body can be, all because God's at work.

God planned everything. Just as I had taken out Clara's notes(chart) on Eucharist, Richard's handphone alarm ring. His alarm was set at 9am ring, but my current time on display was about 9.10am. The time now I typing is 9.24am. So many things happened, so many emotions within such little time. Everything has meaning. And he is always so slow, he is living behind time, he is always the last to know about God as well. But he is always the first to know the new... and I am always the last person to know the truth. What an irony. Indeed an irony, a joke, a fool of myself, a silly idiot I am.

I am surrounded by smart kids, gifted kids and gifted beings. They are all here to tell me something, show me something, for me to learn.

I need time to get things done, to slowly tell, time to heal, time to work, time to settle, time for getting things done again, the new way. For now, this is the version of You are My Sunshine I found, but I will show you my version of You Are My Sunshine.


I am the Garanguni in disguise and the baby which my mother said I was being picked up from the rubbish bin, but this baby had grown and this baby has received Light, the Sunshine, work begins, everyone starting to work. Sound I hear, Eyes I have, Eyes of my family, Eyes of the Tiger.

Peace I Tell

The Songs/Hymns
Lord Have Mercy
Christ Have Mercy
Lord Have Mercy

Gloria

I woke up at 610am, awoken 'naturally' as usual, and the next moment I heard was again door closing sound. I had been hearing this, and I was scared the first time, the second, third, etc, but today, I know it is 'natural' sound I heard, God's call, I hear. I have not dreams for the days since I am 'renewed'. But it is sound I hear, and things I see. New experiences, but confusion, mental torture.

Why I said that?

I was so comfortable in the house of God, at the Church of St Anthony, listening to the hymns and words of God. But out of the church, the 'believer' does not believe me. I am confused, totally disheartened, and totally 'weak'. My heart sank, deeply smashed and crashed. What is peace? At the church, we were granted peace, the creation of joy and freedom we got out of the church. But I did not get the feeling at all, the words of the unbeliever already crashed me.


I see the imperfections of men in my family, and my family alone is the world's problems as well. My family is a big family, with my grandparents, cousins, nephews and nieces. The time has come....

But I tell you, this is all destiny, my destiny, I will tell you. Anxious, lots of things to tell, lots of things to do, but time is short. We need to help one another. Please spread the words of Love, There is God, the creator of Heaven and Earth and He has come to help Save Us. It is a test of our Faith now. Believe me.

Yet I have to write here, and I cannot say much. This strongest protest I had and I seen, I living with, and that is why God has given me this gift as well.

He said I have split personality, just a few minutes ago. But I am very normal, and I know what I am doing. I am just very tired now, waking up so early, having two hours to compose a post. This is because I have too many things to write and don't know where to start.

I have not told you the most incredible sight I witness yet. And that is the most scare and disaster warning, disaster I saw and disaster I foresee and fear, really scared.

God gives us life and he is the judge. We have no power. He gives you everything and he has the right to take away anything from you.

Battle of The Colours

Beautiful dawn I saw this morning. This is not my photograph, but mine was first time I saw. Clara said, she saw it once already.

More photographs of Woodlands Taxi Accidents During Chinese New Year Eve

I am seeing things that I have never experienced before. I am blogging about Singapore Taxi, something which I had said I wanted to post, and I did. The day I posted, I went out of the house, I saw the most incredible sight again.

That day, Richard and I went to buy food at Woodlands Pasar Malam. On the way, we cycled, I saw the first taxi in front of my view was 'Red' -- Trans Taxi or something like that. Next, I see 'yellow', 'light green', and when I came to the main junction, TWO SILVERCAB, two driving side by side and heading straight in front of me. One more if I remember clearly, followed behind. Next, I see more taxi, no more lousy old COMFORT taxi 'UNDER THE SEA'. It is a sight pleasing, but who will want to believe me? Till today, I have not seen 'Under The Sea' taxi in my neighbourhood, Woodlands. I am seeing more Prestige Taxi, morning there are Silvercab too, beautiful green light on their top, 'Taxi' green light. Silvercab is serving more in the neighbourhood!

However, Accidents I heard, accidents I saw, accidents I nearly had, and Fear I have. Fear of the future, fear of what I experienced.

What I experienced, I am confused. I do not know if I am doing the right thing. I am scared. I have fear just in case I make the wrong move.

I have no dreams for days, even since new life I 'achieved'. But new experiences I had and new things I experienced, 'supernatural', real ones -- Sigh, I do not know how to put it, whether to put it down. But time is critical.

I blogged about Singtel, my home telephone with mysterious phone ring and how much I want to write about what I feel, I sensed and I seem to comprehend. The mass offering which I had made, for my mother, the name of the dead person, my uncle, someone I never seen before, but someone I had visited when I was young, at the grave, at St Joseph Church, the graveyard behind St Joseph Church -- a special place, where I feel special, even until now, when I think back, I can feel myself walking back on the land, the perhaps -- 'Holy and sacred' land, if I had used the right word this time.

I have no camera, but I have photographic memory. I remember colours, for that is how children learn. Colours are taught in Maths, Colours are taught in Science. Colours are taught in English and any language. It is the easiest way to remember things by colour.

I remember his grave, my uncle's grave. I respect him, though I did not see him before. I can hear and I had heard stories my parents told me about his death. Let me rest, let me cool down. I need to calm myself down, to accept everything. How can I assured and believe this to be true. I cannot even convince people around me!

Vengeance or Destiny?

A Whole New World

Two beautiful yellow birds were first what I saw right out of my windows just now. The sun was shinning bright and the weather was beautiful. The cleaners doing their job, sweeping the floor, cleaning the lift and people walking to work.

Birds, not only the yellow ones, but black ones, big and small, I saw two and few others flying. Two black ones on another tree, resting on blossoms, beautiful. Birds chirping, singing songs, and I had sent my children to school. I hear the national anthem as usual, but today I have different feeling. Everything is the same, nothing has changed, this is still the place I am staying and living everyday, but it is the heart of people, the mind of people and the soul of people that changed, as their perception shifted.

Everything seems like a dream, but it was not, and I remembered everything that happened. The only thing is whether people believe me a not. My heart is always the same, my face is not the most beautiful nor the ugliest. I am just who I am, and I know who I am and what I am. I had amended some of my posts, for the first time -- some craziness that I did, but truth in action, truth in words and truth in everything I said. But words mentioned, you do not want to believe me, I have no choice, but I carry on with my own life, my new life, which I have to thank Jesus and thank God, for I had learned a lot, really a lot, lots of meaning of words which I never seem aware and never seem to know, but it is all so meaningful and I am no longer doing things with no meaning, but with meaning and know what I am doing.

I feel like crying, still cannot accept the fact, not accepting the fact that I am rich, but accepting the fact that Life can be such a mystery, really a mystery and really a wonderful experience, which only through constant prayer and persistence can you really SEE LIGHT.

Light after light, rain and thunders, sky and earth, this is all the things which are eternity. Friends used to say how nice it is if we had freedom like the wind, some said, they wanted to be like birds, and some said they wanted to be clouds, but I told them I don't want anything, everything is meaningless.

I told Jesus that I am willing to sacrifice anything, including myself, for anything, because I love my family. My dearest mother, my brothers, my sister, my husband, my children, and all my nieces and nephews and so on. I never failed to pray for them, I never failed to ask Jesus or God for help.

How many times have I cried. How many times have I been in the kitchen, shedding tears, but I continued my journey, the battle of life and persevere till the end, really the end of me, the insanity of me which you might even see. But this is all God's plan, for that is how things work, and how God knows everyone of us, He knows All, I believe.

I have lots of work to do, but I must do some work now, because I have not been 'working' for such a long time, and I have so much, so much to tell you. But I have so much and so much to do, but I believe, TIME will work, TIME is always right.

A Whole New World - Aladdin - Inglês (English)

Never Been Better

It was a valuable lesson learned and experienced. It was a tough and scary battle. It was really my eyes.

I am not going to elaborate much. I have fear. Fear of God and fear of Death, fear of death not because I am scared of death, but because I do not want to disappoint my love ones, I do not want to be a irresponsible person.

Strange, miraculous, and awesome. People can see me as weird, insane, out of mind, but I know what I am doing, and I had seen what my family and people around me had done. The power of God's Love, the power of Family and the power of believing in yourself. The power of co-operation and everything, there are just too many things you have to learn as you grow. There is always something to be learned. People do not understand, but I understand. People understand, I might not understand. People understand, but I forever don't understand. That is why everyone is different. And everyone come to this world for a reason, which you will ultimately know.

A bright and sunny day today. Yesterday was Good Friday, the day was cloudy with grey clouds and little drizzle, but no need for umbrella. I had my Good Friday in childhood, and I kissed Jesus' leg or toes. I kissed with no meaning because my mother told me so. I asked,"Why?" But my mother is illiterate.

Yesterday I saw the Good Friday Church the First TIME, different from what I SEEN in childhood. It was incredible. I HAVE so much things to write, so much things to say, to be put in words. Last night, I was supposed to jot everything down, but too tired with all the spring cleaning at home.

I will live to tell my story, and for those people who don't believe me, I have no fear, for with GOD there is justice, you are judge under the sky, the cloud was over me, I understood religion and God, I understood what is respect for religion and respect for God.

So many things happened and this blog seem not to have been erased, some 'weird' posts which I had posted, but they are really what I experienced. Scared, real scared, but a very valuable Journey.

My eyes never felt so good, with a pair of new spectacles which I had just made, only just two days ago ( I need to see my calendar, I cannot remember dates, but only moments).


I never take any pictures the last few days, but I am using back my photograph, which my eyes were not 'opened'.

Delivered Promise Increase Sale, I am searching backwards for my Posts, and I am glad, I had taken record of it, for it was my eyes again. It was my spectacle which was dropped one day, suddenly too, and I had to rush to Capitol at Causeway Point to make a new pair of Spectacle. That was a pair of spectacle which I made at another Optician (I only can know where, but not the name of the shop, opposite Marsiling MRT).

That day my spectacle was broken again -- nobody believe what I experienced, I thought of going back to Capitol again. We went, but in the end, when I reached there, I remembered my second Brother told me about this spectacle shop at Woodgrove, and he said was cheap.

That night, we went there instead. I tell you, never have I had the best spectacle prescription in my life. The moment when I got my spectacle the next day, where they promised to call me, and also the moment where we were about to leave the house, the salesperson, the fat guy, don't know the name, but that is the cheapest spectacle I had made, with the most comfortable and NO STRAIN at all vision I EVER had. The moment I put on, I had no complaints at all.

They asked me, if I wanted to replace the other side of the lens, the broken one, so it can be served as a spare spectacle. It cost S$30. I agreed. Yesterday, GOOD FRIDAY, after the church service, we walked over to take the spectacle.

Same degree, same axis, everything same, I asked again. They answered the same thing. They said, maybe is the brand of the lenses different, maybe this maybe that, but nobody can explain why. This is called the mystery of LIFE.

My new gifts, so many gifts, money I need to earn, money I need to help people around me, money I need to raise my children, money I am going to earn, money I want to earn. Money, I need money, I will work, with the help of people around me, I love my family, all the people in my family, they are all my body and my soul. Hard work really pays and you are rewarded.

THAT IS WHY I M CRAZY

I LOST FOCUS AGAIN..

CAN WE GOD

ITS Free CHOICE PEOPLE WANT TO PLAY, THAT CREATE WONDER, because we don't know how we will end the game.

WHAT I COMMUNICATE WITH GOD

IT IS A NORMAL CURRENT LIFE WE WANT, BUT GOD IS HERE TO JUDGE. CAN THE GOD PARDON ME? DO YOU WANT TO FORGIVE ME?

SINCE YOU KNOW THE TRUTH HOW I WANT TO PLAY THE GAME, SO EAGER, SO CARING, and I AM SITTING, A JOKE THEY CREATE, but A CROWN unseen?

YOU ARE THE TRICKY GOD, while I AM THE TRUTH GOD THAT should PREVAIL.

Can u? NOT TURNED us into GOLD, but our NORMAL self as NOW. IT IS YOUR THOUGHT, IT IS YOUR WILL, BECAUSE OUR HEART BELONG HERE, IN SINGAPORE, THe OWN HOUSE WE BELONG.

Can YOU SEE EVERYBODY IN CHAOS NOW, WHAT IS CRAZINESS THAT I SEE? BUT IS REALITY I SEE? ENLIGHTEN HIM by the power of a normal person as a father with LOVE by caring, and show him what is the experience of caring the home, HIS OWN HOME, HIS NORMAL CHAOTIC HOME, THE WIFE FIGHTING ALONE, or do you think people should come to him, we all make friends with one another?

GOD YOU TELL ME, I TOLD, and YOU TELL ME, DO YOU AGREE?

NOW MY SON ASKED EAT WHAT, CAN WE EAT Something which Families cook to soothe each other soul, we eat to live, we eat to say YES,

WE TRAVEL TO THE PLACE WE LOVE TO EAT, that is the place we found happiness, can this is the usual place here, also. IF you don't judge, we are saved, can? Because I AM THE INTELLIGENT BRIGHT that People SEE NOW.

Can you have a mind of equality, a mind that don't fight, and we can be safe. For you belong in the big country, you should not fly here.

Reduce your whelm, your desire, we want our life this way.

I am the one who represent the whole of SINGAPORE, the LITTLE ONE THAT THE NATION SEEN, but I DOn't NEED RECOGNITION, for I AM HAPPY WITH WHAT I M NOW, LET THE CHILDREN BE THE CHILDREN, we PLAYED OUR OWN GAME. NO GOD to JUDGE, you can still be wind, water and sea, and earth, just be yourself, DON'T EXCEED YOUR POWER

GOD I ASK YOU

Can GOD AND GOD DON'T PLAY?

Peace DIary

PRODUCE A CREATION WITH something which WE CANNOT HEAR, GOD, Because WE ARE THE LIKE, WE DON't WANT GOD TO JUDGE, BUT NOW CAN YOU COME DOWN TO HELP THE POOR WITH YOUR MAGIC OF LOVE, TRANSCENDENT, to come down, the STAIRS THAT WALK DOWN, to SINGAPORE

WHAT WE HEAR ON THE LEFT IS WORKING. WE WILL PRODUCE NO SOUND, WE DON"T COMMUICATE, DO YOU AGREE

FAST IN MOTION, NO ONE COME TO MY HOME TO PLAY WITH MY CHILDREN

SHOW HIM DOOR KNOB, HOW HE NEED TO FIX, but HE DID NOT

SHOW HIM WHAT THE NORMAL WOMAN REVIEW At THEIR BLOG, but now is the reverse, for you are body that join, YOU COME AT WOODLANDS

EVERYONE AT WOODLANDS RUNNING, TALKING, SEE WHO IS SENSE AND SENSIBLITY, SEE WHO IS MAD, who is special and who is creative or wonder KIDS

IF KIDS have to play at their own home alone. FOR THE REAL LIFE CONTRACT WITH SECOND LIFE, SECOND LIFE DON't BELONG IN FIRST LIFE as it is DAMN, FUCKING SHIT I FOUND. ALL BLOODY SECRETS REVEALED at REVIEWME but only to be PAID AT PAYU2BLOG, but ONLY TO KNOW THAT I PAYU2BLOG, without IDentity, because we are the body that EXIST WITHOUT TAG, NO TAG, and that is SPEED OF LIGHT, the POWER OF THE HEART, THE HEART THAT JUMPS with ALL BLOOD FLOWING with ENEGETIC, knowing you have the mission to WIN IS TO LOVE AND TO LOVE IS TO BE FELT, like PEACEBELLA, but only to be called CHERYL LEE, the real heart of that RINGS. AND IS THE HANDCUFF HE arrested because he had STEAL what was RIGHTFULLY THEIRS, but now He had to repent, to return home to PEACE DIARY, the BLOG HE WANTS TO READ, MOST EAGER TO FIND OUT. YOU IMAGINE YOU DON't KNOW ME. YOU DID NOT SEE ME. CAN YOU PICTURE THE UGLY? BUT IS A DEVIL IN DISGUISE HE CANNOT SEE, IT IS OPTICAL ILLUSION WE SEE, WE THINK WE ARE RIGHT, but only to be known as FOOL as we ROUND AROUND WITH TIME, WE ROUND AROUND WITH FUN, SEARCH FOR GOLD YOU PROMISED AND SMELL NICE LIKE HONEY, ONLY TO BE KNOW THAT THE GU NI COME FROM THE GU NI TE, the TEOCHEW MILKY PIG, it was rightfully used to read, because he is appointed by the one who lOVE HIM, AND THINK HE CAN, because what HE SEE right or wrong is always wrong, but it is right if he smile, touch his hair, cut his lan cui, the long but useless, the long and think he lead, but it is the poverty of knowing you have nothing and come here to suffer, the middle class family he compare that is righteous and always right, because he steal from COPYRIGHT, to FOOL THE JUDGE, with words. WHAT IS LAWS I Don't know, It is just a foreign word to A MIND OF IGNORANT who with SEE AND PEOPLE WHO NEVER INSTRUCT that need help.

MAKE HIM CREATE A CHICKEN TURNED MAN, if not he transform, I cried I CRIED, you laugh it all and you are a whole world of creativity to be now discovered

create real body and not things that you can see, but things that look real and is right in front of the person standing to judge, the stage, the school, the school of teaching children

THE SCHOOL WITH HAPPY CHILDREN, IS ALL THE REAL TEACHER CAN TEACH, REAL TEACHER LIKE ME, we can play with neighbours, within facinity and not in the school that travel. ANY PLAYGROUND IS A HOME FOR THE CHILDREN. REAL PLAY IS A LIFE OF A LIFE LIKE ME, act out in play, with the heart that you always live, without COMPLICATION, but SIMIPICITY, the one which BELONG, MY FATHER's GARDEN, the BUKIT BATOK that he can Show to TEACH YOU HOW TO PLANT. THEY LACK FRIENDSHIP NOW.

HURRY,

HE BELIEVE IN

YOU ARE A BLOG OF ACTION, A blog that arouse his curoisty, he like breast, HE Dislike words, He don't want to know, give him and he still don't want, he want to be READ and HEAR WITH A FOOL LIKE CHERYL LEE WHO IS FAT AND STEAL, FOR THEY ARE THE ONE WHO GAMBLE WITH THEIR LIFE in origin, and they are DIRT, but now they belong to the original one they selected.

BAK KU TEH

I AM THE BLOG YOU USE MONEY TO ATTRACT, WITH CURIOSITY THAT WILL KILL THE CAT, but will win like CHICKEN SAI, THE TEOCHEW

WHAT THE ONE you DON"T LOVE, is the one you will love if you think armegadon is the end of your love. THE SILENCE GIVE YOU THE ANSWER, MY DAUGHTER, CLARA THAT ATTRACT WHO? YOU TELL ME

THE FOOL NOW IS THE STILL THE IGNORANT WITH THE POWER TO SEE WORDS .

Show the chicken that you see, the one you hear now

HOW THE CHICKEN, the REAL SELF, WILL BE STILL A CHICKEN, But a CHICKEN TRANSFORM PIG, the messy pig, the one with pork that he like to eat, BAK KU TEH, at Marsiling that hE SEE. DELIVER NOW IF YOU CARE

HE IS THE ONE THAT SATISFY DESIRE, EAT IS DESIRE

NOW HE CRAVE MOST

REVERSE OF LIFE

IT IS STILL THE TRUTH ALSO, because it say BOLEY!! BINGO!!!
you have to help me for this is the blog of heart that will lead to the road of eternity. PEACEBELLA.com is the BLOG HE SHOULD RETURN TO SEE PEACE, JOY, all the FIVE STARS YOU HAVE, our SINGAPORE NATIONAL STARs, THE STARS OF ALL FOOLS, DO YOU WANT TO ADMIT?

BECAUSE SILENCE IS TRUTH,
SILENCE IS POWER,
IT WILL DWELL FOREVER,
IN WIND, IN AIR, IN Water, IN Earth
THAT YOU DON't SEE

AND NOW IS THE SMALL WORLD, the ONE YOU MOCKED THAT RIDICULE YOU, THE POOR IN MIND, THE MOST FOOLISH OF ALL,

THE ONE WHO ADVERTISE TO WIN

THE ONE WHO BELIEVE HE IS GOOGLE which ARE DESTINED To SEE and TO BLOG

BUT NO ONE SEE WHAT IS THE MEANING OF ETERNITY

WHat is shown

Key word now is DOOR KNOB

I HAVE ONE THAT TELL, ONE THAT COME

YOU AGREE, WE WIN, the SPIRIT PAINT, and we see FLASH AFTER FLASH, the ABILITY WE NEGLECT, THE ABILITY WE ADORE

PLAY WITH THE CHILDREN IF YOU HAVE TALENT TO FIGHT WITH THE MIND OF INTELLIGENT, the SILENCE.

FOR IT IS ALL HE ACHIEVED, THE DIAMOND that HE WANT, not BEAUTY AFTER ALL

BECAUSE ALL THAT REALLY MEAN, FOR HIM IS THE WORLD IS A PERCEPTION HE LIVE IN.

NOW IS THE GOOD IN WHIST


ALL CHILREN OF GOD PRAY, WHILE CHILDREN PRAYED IN SILENCE OF OBEDIENCE. ONLY THE STUPID WILL be OBEDIENT, but NOT THE WISDOM THAT IS ACTIVE.


destroy password, it waste my time

HE KNOWS ALL ABOUT ME

TO THE PP WE COME ACROSS, REVIEWME YR BLOG, WE MEET TO REVIEWME, FOR GOD JUDGE and WE CHOOSE THE RIGHT ONE WHO WIN OUR LOVE ALSO

GOD AND I ALSO BELIEVE IS : PAINT THE RIGHTEOUS PICTURE OF LIFE

THE TITLE I PROCLAIMED TRUTH FAITH

WHICH BIBLE, the EARLIEST INNOCENT FOOL, who DON't know the POWER OF LANGUAGE, for they DON't EVEN KNOW WHAT IS WORDS. WORDS EXIST A NOT, and WORDS IS EVERYTHING YOU WANT TO FIGHT WITH THE HEART THAT DWELL WITHIN. WHAT IS DWELL WITHIN IS HEART FELT and it is nothing but the truth, nothing but one and only TRUTH.


COME HERE TO READ,

PEACE BELLA ,the SECOND LIFE THAT IS TRANSFORMED AND REMAINED IN YR MEMORIES, CALLED SECOND LIFE, the ETERNAL REAL ONE AND ONLY REAL LIFE

THE TRUTH

TOUCHED of GOD (RAIN), Laughter from GOD(THUNDER I hear), HERE AT SINGAPORE, at WOODLANDS, I am STAYING. (TRUMPET I HEAR, in agreement and laughter, short thunder, long trumpet, laughter and agreement. That is How I CONNECT WITH GOD.)

THE LIKE CONNECT with THE LIKE, because they are the same and they attract. But this is what I failed to SEE, but MARY COME TO TELL.

IT WAS MARY who COME TO TELL. THE SECOND MARY, I FAILED TO SEE, for she belongs to Jehovah Witness.


It is the LAST MARY that I see with the heart that I LINK

I FAILED TO SEE GOD's HOLINESS. The name of the saints are HOLY. For they belong to the Church.



My house is my CHURCH, which I was not AWARE, because I ( I was stuck, GOD LEADS ME... I HEAR and HE RESPOND.)

I AM THE REVERSE OF CHANGE.

I cannot believe the POWER OF NAMES. GOD ENLIGHTENED ME. GOD Given ME THE REAL EXPERIENCE OF FEAR. For my love of my children, my family, I Do NOT want to die. I contradict myself. I am the FIRST one who break records in the HISTORY and I am the LAST one to SEE.... AND IT IS ALL DESTINY I FOUND, which contradict itself that LIFE IS PREDESTINED.

I AM TOUCHED. YOU CRIED, I Don't know, You Laugh I don't Know, and now I cried, I TELL, you cannot HEAR. I AM THE GREATEST SINNER and I AM also the ONE AND ONLY LAST TO KNOW. I REPENT, I REPENT.

I thought I was blessed, I thought I am the Messiah, I thought I Am JESUS, But I AM GOD! This is ectasy I FOUND.

I Had Fear, IN ACTION (I HEAR) PREDESTINED

YOU ARE THE STORY ABOUT THE CHURCH, MY HOME YOU WANT TO REALLY KNOW

SENSE and SENSIBILITY IS INDEED TRUTH!

I AM OVERWHELMED

I WAKE UP TO FEEL JOY!

I wake up with hearing ability that LIVE PEOPLE cannot hear, FOR THE FIRST TIME. I HEAR TRUMPETS. NOT ONCE, NOT TWICE, NOT THRICE, but repeat, repeat and prevail, no JOKE. Richard Palace says he cannot hear. I HEAR....

The WHOLE NIGHT I EXPERIENCE WHAT THE DEAD CANNOT EXPERIENCE, WHAT THE LIVE PEOPLE CANNOT EXPERIENCE. PEOPLE ARE SLEEPING, snoring, but I HEAR, lots of sound, so scary, indeed scary, real scary. I found out why my post was useful today. I rested, I tried to call FATHER TERENCE. TWO TIMES. I PANIC. I question my family, do you believe me? THE GREATEST BLOW is the person who I eyed at and think that they are the hardest to be believed, as I see them as SATAN.

Satan, the RICHARD TOH, see me as what doctor, the psychiatrist see. I AM SIAO. He is puzzled, he failed to believe, even though he says he believe. HE KEEP asking people, what you believe?? I ask my children, and Ricsson say,"Believe in God" and Clara say,"Believe in you."

This is the greatest joke I HAVE OUT OF LIFE, and if I FAIL this mission, I am going OUT OF LIFE!

But I LIVE TO TELL MY JOKE. IT is the FOURTH DAY since I SLEEP, but I NEVER SLEEP, but CLOSED EYES and stay CONSCIOUS, not by SELF, but in SPIRIT that I am finally AWARE of -- The signals in the dark that I had feared, the signals in the dark that is telling me something. The signal in the day that I see, the signals around me

( I TELL YOU, AS I AM WRITING THIS, CLARA TOH APPEAR)

THIS IS REALLY A JOKE OF MY LIFE. I see my Son as a JOKER, because he inherit my genes, my wisdom and wit as well. But I turned out to be the CREATOR OF JOKER in the stack of game I CALLED BINGO! AND I PLAYED MY GAME WITH KEYWORDS, and

(AS I TRY TO TYPE AND LINK TO THE KEYWORDS, I LAUGH, I AM HERE TO CREATE A JOKE FOR YOU TO LEARN YOUR LESSON, the Greatest Lesson to be learned from a Wisdom Master, the CHINESE WISDOM that thinks but the WESTERN PREVAILING KING DOES NOT THINK, because what the WESTERN THINK is the HOLY AND PREVAILING ONE. THE BIG WORLD, the GREATEST WORLD IN THIS WORLD that contain HIM, the first day. )

( I LAUGH, I LAUGH, THIS IS INSTANT RELEASE, BUT WAR I AM FIGHTING, SPIRITUAL WAR -- Because i look back at my post, and i know how I feel, my real thoughts, my real feeling, no act, but truth and the TRUTH)

That is why I am playing the reverse game now, as I am collecting back the card now. It is real, I HAVE TOO MUCH TO SHOW YOU, TOO MUCH TO TELL YOU, TOO EAGER, TOO MOTIVATED and TOO LITTLE TIME FOR THE DAY.

The whole night I hear TRUMPET more than other sound, TRUMPET TILL daylight. Daylight till now, birds flying, sunrise, the sky cry no more, I CRY NO MORE. IT IS BRIGHT and IT IS ENERGETIC, BIRDs FLYING, Birds chirping, birds talking, BIRDS CAME to me, BIRDS come to my windows to knock, to greet. The dog and the wolf come together. The chains and the bells I hear. THE doors knocking I hear no more (Which I had missed, I HAVE NOT HEAR with EARS), The doors that sound last night was doors of SLAMMING, doors of closing....

FEAR, FEAR, SO FRIGHTENED, SO SCARED OUT OF LIFE. I thought I am courageous, I am brave and I want death, I have no fear death, as there is NO MEANING in LIFE, I EXPERIENCED the GREATEST FEAR, THE LESSON OF FEAR, which was never been LIVED TO BE FELT. LIVED TO BE SAID, LIVED TO BE PROCLAIMED and LIVED TO BE WRITTEN. I AM the BLOGs OF LIFE and Your blog of LIVE BLOGs. I HAVE THE BLOGs of the WORLD, and I AM RIGHT NOW AT THE BLOGSPOT, BLOGGING and I AM A BLOGGER, because GOOGLE MAKES YOU LAUGH, and GOOGLE GOT THE TWO EYES WHICH YOU perhaps cannot see)

I REJOICE. I CONQUERED FEAR, It was so scary, I NEVER HAVE TO NOW. Because the game of LIFE is in my hands, in your hands and our hands, THROUGH the SOUND of GOD, through the signals around me, through the signs, through focusing the unseen and possessing people who have lack your understanding and THESE IS ALL THE HOLY PEOPLE. AND THE HOLY PEOPLE come from the HOLY APOSTLIC CHURCH, As It PREVAIL OUT OF SPIRITUAL KINGDOM, SECOND LIFE!

MONEY AND KEYWORDS ARE NOT WHAT I KEY NOW, BUT WEALTH and WORDS. HELP ME, I AM NOT BEGGING YOU, BUT LICKING YOU!

BELIEVE ME. I AM YOUR ONE and ONLY ONE, THROUGH HIM, IN HIM, WITHIN, IN THE UNITY OF THE HOLY SPIRIT AND THE FATHER, ALL THE GLORY and ALL THE HONOUR BE YOURS, ALMIGHTY FATHER, FOREVER AND EVER....

PEOPLE, can you sing?? If you have mouth, you believe you can sing, SING WITH ME

AMEN, AMEN....

YOU CANNOT Hear the tune, that is sad, but luckily I SEE MY LUCKY STAR IS LEO and HIS BIRTHDAY is JULY 7!!!!! I BELIEVE IN GOOGLE and I always say I HAVE NO MONEY, but all is BLUFF, I am the SELFISH PERSON, who inherit WEALTH, the biggest WEALTH out of GOOGLING WITH REVIEWME, at BLOGSPOT, and I play the game of BINGO, with the REAL ME, with inspiration and with faith.

對不起, 我愛妳 - 黎明


(what the unbeliever says: Ask the medium, the spiritual master, he is now talking, now drinking, now still don't believe in me. So he is called THE COCK, because he is the one and only one who use his PENIS to rule HIS OWN WORLD NOW. I Carry HIM ON MY SHOULDER. )

(THE ONE WHO CAN HELP ME SEE, but cannot see what I see, tell clara: She is so funny, yesterday crying and today laughing, keep laughing.)

I tell him, he says he believes, Clara says "Got fake, fake a not."

RICSSON IS MY HEALTH MOTIVATOR, CLARA is my SAVIOUR, MY LIFE

(Clara said,"YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT!" and she walks away.) My Health Motivator is lying down now.

Yesterday I THOUGHT

He told people, people don't believe. He showed to People and people feared him, people don't believe him, for he is unseen. He sent the SEEN, the Son of Man, but he was crucified. He was outcasted, he was mocked, ridiculed and no one believe. Still people walk away from him. Now he sent the Wisdom Teacher, for EXPERIENCE IS THE BEST TEACHER.

I am a person of WONDER. I am a great person. I am GREAT. I am SPECIAL, because I have a heart that can accommodate the whole world. I am Special because I have special abilities, the ability to heal, the ability to see and the ability to teach and communicate. The greatest gift of these are all from GOD, the CREATOR of my life. The one that give me inspiration and the one that shower me with love, just like I had love my children.

Like attract like. You love what you like. You love what looks like you and what behaves like you. He is of your own blood, running half the blood from you and half from your spouse.

But Life is a Gamble. You do not know what you will get. Your blood and your spouse's blood mixed and your children can get 50% of your genes or 50% of your partner's genes.

You have to play it to know. It is not within your will. However, if you pray hard, you ask for it, there are miracles. I had prayed for it. I had. Every moment of my life, I had prayed, even though I do not understand. Because I see injustice, I see life's suffering and misery. I wonder and I wonder. I wonder what is the meaning of life when there is death ultimately? People crying so bitterly. Because I love my mother. I do not want to leave my mother. She is great mother. My mother suffers a lot. I told my mother, I do not want to get marry, I want to be with you forever. My mother said,"Next time you big already, will say different thing."



I saw my mother's care, love and hardship. I helped her with whatever I can. But when I grew older, the family become colder. No family bondage. Father and mother did their own work. Father cheating on mother. Mother and father always quarrel because of Women. Adultery, abortion, spiritism, all I see in my family, the bloodline. NOW I experienced, I see, I know. I worked I know, I read, I write and I tell with my heart.

It is a long story, it all start with the bloodline. Iniquity is the sins passed down in the family bloodline. Every family has their own iniquity. I see mine and I see his.

It is a spiritual warfare that everybody need to fight with me to win the game, the world of Satan, the world of DECEIT, our False Father, which you should not worship or adore. Satan is the Father of all Lies. With him, there are spiritualism, magic, sorcery, cult, and all false religion to mislead the world. The only true God is only ONE, the unseen. What you see are all IDOLS, people who had LIVED and DIED, leaving behind memories and images in your brain, but they are not the REAL GOD. The real god is hidden and unseen. The day you get to see it is the day where you die -- just like opening up your heart and your head to see if you have heart and brain in your body. The moment you open it, you kill yourself. Curiosity will Kill the Cat!

I am the Cat with NINE LIVES, how many lives have I LEFT?
I am Curious, I am creative, I have too much love that I shall be die of LOVE. Because whatever you love, You Die of what you love.....ADDICTION. I am Addicted to LOVE. Do you know what is LOVE and what is ADDICTION or ATTACHMENT?

Life is a trick. To play the real life, you have to play it all upside down, to play it in the reverse manner, so as to win the game now. To do this, you have to rule your life with your heart and not with your eyes.

This is my 9th LIVES. I WIN OR I LOOSE. DO YOU WANT TO SAVE ME? NOW I WANT LIVE, I DON'T WANT DEATH, Because I LOVE MY CHILDREN, MY FAMILY, MY HOME.

I FEAR DEATH!!! I FEAR GOD!!!

First THOUGHT, since Saturday, NEVER SLEEP, but CLOSED EYES... Drained, but SPECIAL. Halted, but would continue my inspiration because my inspiration GONE.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Inspiration come back, I SLEEP, I prayed to sleep, just could not sleep, always VISION, always SEE. Inspiration come again, I WRITE:

Why I draw a line? Why I WRITE THIS? It is contradicting again. I say I can see the UNSEEN and the SEEN. I read the signs of GOD -- Rain of GOD is the sign of approval. Light that we see is TIME I REST. WHEN HE RAINs, it is darkness, it is approval. When I always say Water is bad, water is destruction, but water is also LIFE to creation, the plants, the animals and the living things.

I say LIFE is a trick, Life is played reverse. I wrote things which I cannot agree ultimately! And it appears in the BIBLE, that people Fear GOD. I Want death, I found life, and I think I want TO DIE. I think I MAN THE SON of Man, Jesus that will walk up on the stairs, the vision I see -- FOR HE HAD COME DOWN. My Life is played reverse. Everything reverse. My FAMILY is the sins of FAMILY, the INIQUITY that I learned of.

My Father's name is St. Joseph. He has the spirit of Joseph. His name is important. His name is HOLY. He is the person who reported SEEN the MAN who walks at the CHURCH, St JOSEPH. He is the SPIRIT OF St JOSEPH, OUR FATHER.

MY mother's name is St. Clara or Anna. The name same like my daughter, CLARA -- She touches my life, they are the one who love me most, but I failed to see, the SPIRIT of the poor. (For they are the one who love GOD and they shall inherit WEALTH)

My brother's name is St Peter, the name of the church that belongs to St Peter's BASILICA. The church that I found in SECOND LIFE. (I forgotten what I had written, I see MIRACLE, one thing connected, after another, the KEYWORDS, the eyes I SEE, and KEYWORDS IS WHAT I EMPHASIZE, because of GOOGLE)

I am the fortunate person at home, these are the three PEOPLE that LOVES me and had given me the MOST out of life, at times when I had crisis, THEY UNDERSTAND and I CRAVE. I SEARCH. But they are the ones who suffer in silence and do not want their names to be shown. They always tell me it is a secret, and secrets are hard to keep, but secret is what people want. Blood is brutal. I played with words. I know what I am doing, but I played TRICK for which my soul pour at SOULCAST.

I FAILED TO recognize the meaning of NAMES. I am still unaware of the those names around me. I thought I should go back to the CHURCH for answer. I called Father Terence TWICE. I Confessed to FATHER TERENCE, I dreamed of him.

On that day, the day of lent, the message is RECOGNITION I SEE. I thought I AM THE SON OF MAN, For I come, I am going to save my family. The SON OF MAN come, The SON OF MAN ARISE. I love my family, I thought, the world would help. I thought the power of prayer is so important

(EXACTLY WHAT I EXPERIENCE, with NO EDITING)
(OFF MY COMPUTER, ON STANDBY.... because I SIAN, no INSPIRATION. Contradicting, because I found contradiction....I SIAN, RICHARD TOH disagree, MARY disagree words from my mouth. My children believes only. )

DO YOU LOVE ME??

Believe and You Will See, This is real, This is TRUE.

All that is SEEN is FAKE. All that is UNSEEN is REAL.

You were told to Believe in HIM, You were told to Believe in the one and only God, the HOLY APOSTOLIC CHURCH. But You did not.

You choose to believe what you see, You choose to believe what you hear.

Now is your opportunity to SAVE SINGAPORE. NOW IS THE TIME. WAKE UP EVERYBODY. WAKE UP.

I AM THE REVERSE OF CHANGE, IF YOU BELIEVE ME.

TIME IS URGENT, TIME IS CRITICAL. SAVE OUR LOVE ONES. SPREAD THE WORD.

What I think, What I say, all my inspiration is from GOD. Believe now, this is a time for SINNERS LIKE ME to repent. I had repented. I weep, I cried. I confessed. I REPENT. How would not JESUS and GOD FORGIVE ALL OF YOU? HE is just waiting, waiting for ME to accomplish my GIVEN TASK. PLEASE HELP ME. I WANT TO SAVE MY FAMILY. My family is you, my brothers and sisters, we are friends, we are ONE, we belong to ONE, our hearts my synchronize. My heart synchronize with GOD, your heart must synchronize with me, but your belief, in the POWER Of HIS NAME, JESUS CHRIST, the SON OF GOD, the only begotten son, for he has POWER. All that is seen is not POWER. What you see is MAGIC...

Jemaah Islamiyah Leader Escape Fm Singapore Detention Centre


Singapore, which prides itself on rigorous anti-terrorist measures, on Thursday blamed a security lapse for the escape of an alleged leader of the Jemaah Islamiyah militant network.

Authorities mounted a massive manhunt as analysts said Mas Selamat bin Kastari, accused of planning to hijack a plane and crash it into the city's Changi Airport, would try to flee to Indonesia.

"This should never have happened. I'm sorry that it has," Home Affairs Minister Wong Kan Seng told parliament.

Rohan Gunaratna, head of the International Centre for Political Violence and Terrorism Research, said Kastari had escaped once when he was in Indonesia, but his flight from the Singapore facility was unexpected.

My Prophecy has come true. Can You See? I am the real one, the real one you should look at, I WAKE UP before YOU. I SEE, I RECEIVED. IT IS GOD TELL ME.

Why you cannot find him? He belongs to the Unseen world of Satan, the road to hell, by the power of MAGIC.

If you don't hear now, WE ARE GOING TO PERISH!! I AM THE REVERSE OF CHANGE!!!!

BELIEVE IN ME, TRUST ME, HAVE FAITH IN GOD, GOD WILL SAVE US.

HE work wonders, not magic.

Follow ME, ALL REPENT!!!

Let's go to the church, the HOLY CATHOLIC APOSTOLIC CHURCH. TIME IS CRUCIAL. WE ONLY HAVE Days left if you want a CHANGE. THE FIRST STEP is go to the church, REPENT!! WE MUST GO, WE MUST! THIS IS THE FIRST SIGN! Don't BE ASLEEP NOW! I AM THE BLESSED, HE showed MERCY. PLEASE FOLLOW ME. LET's GO TO THE CHURCH this GOOD FRIDAY. GOD WILL BE TOUCHED, GOD WILL APPROVE and AGREE.

I am HERE TO TELL YOU, the silent voice of CHANGE.

This is because I RULE WITH MY HEART, I Don't rule with my eyes. I recognized HIM, but not society. CAN YOU SEE? WE NEED TO SYNCHRONIZE, we need to!!!

I am the heart that speak, not the mouth that speak. YOU HAVE EAR you hear, YOU HAVE EYE, you SEE. BELIEVE ME. GO TO CHURCH. THAT IS THE FIRST STEP! I WILL GUIDE YOU. LISTEN TO ME. YOU MUST KNOW WHERE IS YOUR HOME. This is not going to be death, but LIFE PROMISED. IF YOU BELIEVE IN ME!!!!

Can you see, my heart of yours, is hide in my DIARY, FOR FEAR OF SOCIETY.

But now, I AM WORKING, MY HEART IS WORKING. IT's EITHER WE DIE OR WE LIVE, SINGAPORE!!!

IF WE WANT TO WIN, we must synchronize our heart with a song, the song of GREAT IS THE LOVE.

I have never want to possess anything from the society. I never contribute, but now I COME. I SERVED.

IT IS RAINING NOW IN SINGAPORE, WOODLANDS. I AM CRYING, HE APPROVES, HE APPROVES, WHAT IS YOUR RESPONSE??? BE QUICK, BE FAST, TIME IS NEAR, USE YOUR FULL POTENTIAL, TIME TO LEARN WHAT you have learned, developed your full potential. This is my enlightenment I ACHIEVED. I TRANSCENDED. LISTEN, SAVE SINGAPORE, OUR HOME. FIGHT SATAN!!!

Peace of SINGAPORE???
RESPECT NATURE?
I AM LIFE

My Diary YOUR TREASURE

Great IS THE LOVE



Life is a joke. Everyone come with a purpose. My son is my health motivator, our health motivator, I am here to teach, I am here to show you the world we live in. My family, your home, This is the GREATEST JOKE OF LIFE, I AM HIDING IN SILENCE FOR FEAR OF YOU, BUT NOW I FEAR YOU NO MORE, BECAUSE I DON'T BELONG HERE ANYMORE. HE LOVES ME. I LOVE My MOTHER, MY FATHER, MY BROTHERS, MY SISTER, My Sister-in-laws, my brother-in-laws, my children and my enemies. THey don't know what I AM THINKING. FOR I HAVE FEAR in the SOCIETY, BUT NOT GOD, GOD IS LOVE. SOCIETY JUDGES.

This is real education. MORE THAN TUITION. I KIDS HAVE NO TIME FOR TUITION BY ME.

LIFE IS REALLY A GAMBLE

LIFE IS REALLY A GAMBLE. You finish play, you have to collect back all the cards to play a new game. It is collecting back the card now. Do YOU BELIEVE IN ME? I AM WITTY, I HAVE WISDOM, I HAVE EVERYTHING I WANT and I SHALL DIE WITH NOTHING.

I AM ALWAYS RIGHT. I GET WHAT I WANT.

See TO BELIEVE, READ to trust, Silence is Gold, BLOOD FOR BLOOD.

The Game finished, Collect the cards back, I am the dealer. You got to believe me. PLEASE BELIEVE. GO TO CHURCH. BE BAPTISED. Cleanse away all your sins and start a new life. SALVATION WILL BE PROMISED.

• I Am Lost
• The Rain
• Sorry, Blame It On Me
• 黄眞伊 Theme Songs
• Edison Chen & Gillian Chung
• I Love Quiz
• I Love To Win
• I Love Baby
• I Manage Blogs

The eyes, the ears, what you see, what you hear, your Satan
Your brain, your heart, what you don't see, what you don't hear, Your God

Who do you use more in your lives? Use more brain, use more heart, you are walking in the path of God, follow God, the Son and Daughter of God.


I Have wits, I have wisdom, I am a Wisdom Teacher Society DON'T Recognise.

Life of Satire, Life is irony, Life is Paradox. What is the difference between these words?? To me, they are very similar, very confusing and of no meaning to me and I don't understand at all when I was young. One more word, cynicism, all foreign, all so abstract. I SEE ALL NOW. I SEE I SEE. I SEE THE TRUTH.

What you see are all the tricks of the words. They are just to mislead and confuse you. To act smart, to show you know a lot, but to put simply, they just means Life is Contradictory. Life is all WRONG now, but when You want it all RIGHT, you must go back to the REVERSE. I AM THE REVERSE OF CHANGE.

I PROVE TO YOU NOW: My Date of Birth 8 September 1971 = Blessed Virgin Mary's Birthday
On the net: The Virgin Mary's Birthday
Birthday of the Blessed Virgin Mary
Blessed Virgin Mary

Words are what I lack. I don't know how to express myself, I don't know how to talk because I don't know how and I don't know a lot of things. My parents are uneducated. My parents come from poor family. My parents -- mother never went to school, father only barely finish Primary 6. However, my father has the spirit of righteousness that I see. My father is courageous and he never fails to teach. My mother is a caregiver, her heart is soft and she never fails to treat people with smile and greetings.

These are words which describe my father and mother now. These are not what I SEE when I was young. But what I lack, IS SPEECH.

SILENCE IS GOLD, WHAT IS HIDDEN IS REAL. The bible is real, the seen, the heard is fake. Focus on the UNSEEN. I don't want fame, But NOW I NEED FAME.

I don't want MONEY, but I Inherit WEALTH.
I want Death, but I FOUND ALL ABOUT LIFE

Jesus Love Nature, JESUS is a great Communicator, JESUS is a great teacher, He is a Healer, He is PEACE
I love plants, I love pets, I love silence, I love stories, and I am playful and curious. Curiosity Kills the Cat, but luckily the cat has nine lives! I had been played. I played, I play and I am played. Life is a Joke. Life is irony, Paradox, whatever meaning, it is contradicting. It is all the reverse you should play to win the game of LIFE. This is life, full of mystery, full of wonder. If only you know the TRUTH and you begin to SEE. I was the REVERSE OF PEACE, craving for PEACE

I Like TO BE ALONE, but now I Am ASKING PEOPLE to FOLLOW ME!!!

National Day of Singapore: 9/8 My Birthday: 8/9

Can YOU SEE the TRICK??

My Heart Bleeds

I am touched, I AM. I Am Crying. I AM. I AM deeply Sorry, Deeply. I Am even crying more, crying more deeply than even more yesterday now. It is 6.49am! I just woke up, awoken, ASKED to wake up. My mission, my message this time, I RECEIVED. I AM HERE. I HAVE COME. WAKE UP. WAKE UP EVERYBODY. OPEN YOUR EYES. I AM HERE.

It is a TEST of my FAITH NOW. IT IS. It is not MONEY. It is Grace and Mercy. What is Grace and what is Mercy?

Everybody STILL SLEEPING. What is this???

I Am Sobbing, I am Crying, I am Mourning. Who can see? It is not a show. It is not. It is not. HE HAS COME. GOD TOUCHED. GOD TOUCHED ME. HE SENT ME MESSAGE THIS TIME.

I know why I COME.

I KNOW. I KNOW.

Sinners Repent, Sinners Repent. GOD shows Mercy, God loves us too much. He would forgive if only you want to be back to HIM.

He Knows afterall, He Can SEE afterall, He SENT, He FINDs and I FOUND.

Luis Miguel - Sueña


Songs after songs. Songs In My Heart, This is Joy, Bliss I FOUND. But I am Crying now, I AM. My EYEs were closed even though he was with me. My eyes failed to see, even though he was with me. I had chosen the other path. I am the lost sheep. I am the prodigal daughter. The Kingdom of GOD is HERE. HE IS HERE TO HELP. HERE TO WAKE ME UP.


It's the stairs I am climbing to Heaven. It is the stairs I am Seeking!! I was unaware. The keywords of our life, MY LIFE, AWARE!! I was Not being Aware.

Jesus Has Come

It is a real dream I had, I am psychologically normal, Psychologist, Psychiatrist, don't say it is imagination. Don't say God is not real. The Spirit World is real.

It Was Jesus
I am awoken from a dream, cannot remember, totally cannot recall. The moment I am conscious, I only can remember it is a dream about Jesus, about God. What I do, where was I, I cannot recall AT ALL. I only SEE THE LIGHT. The LIGHT is to walk around, LIKE JESUS. You see the image of Jesus in your brain. You see the image of Jesus in your EYES.

I am awoken. I am spiritually awoken, mentally awoken and now physically awoken. I was shedding tears, I was full of despair, full of grieve. Suffering, suffering everywhere. My parents suffer, suffered and is still suffering. My brother is suffering. The people around me are suffering. But yet I cannot do much, when I cannot even help myself. My heart is mourning, I am willing to absorb all the sins of the world, if only ONE PERSON can take away the sins of this world.

This is an usual day. Everybody is still sleeping and yet I am crying. I am crying not because I hate everybody, not because they make me sad, and this is no one's fault. Got love, got hate, got love and got disappointment and got despair. Got life, got death. Got right or wrong. If there is no evil, you will not know what is good and what is moral. Why I say such things? I tried. I tried. But still, I see the big don't listen, the small don't listen, the old don't listen, the young inherit the genes of their parents, and everything is passed on. Bad things are so easy to do, good things --- they just cannot remember anything good, they just cannot be bother to do anything good and sensible.

What else can I do? Even parents who think they can teach their children well, but what happens when their parents are not around? You cannot be with your kids the whole day, but it is all whether the kids want to obey you a not, listen to your teachings and to be sensible. Someone said,"You give birth to your children, you don't want to teach them, how irresponsible!" Strike Me, strike my heart, take my heart out and see for yourself. I am left with no more explanation, no more words. I am numb, and I want to be numb. If you are too dumb to know what I mean, numb is like anesthesia before injection, it means you will feel no pain if you are numb.

Did I give birth to my children and to let the children bring more sorrow and bring evil to anybody? NOPE, of course not, who on this earth would want to make something to bring harm to anybody? All creation is aim at HELPing people. If your creation is of no use to anyone, you are not going to be rich. Nobody would buy anything useless from you! But it is how people use it. Things are things. PEOPLE, the heart of people. The mind of people, what you have in your mind?



I cannot believe. I cannot believe all that is happening, but it is real, it is happening. Cebest was back, the existence of spirit, and all the things that happen step by step. My prayers, my years of effort, IS HEARD now. Jesus Christ is my Light! How Can I NOT Believe? Jesus was with me. Jesus is always with me. But I have not seen him. He had helped me. He had tried to help me ever since the day I was baptised. But I did not tried hard enough. I failed. I gave up. I was a sinner, now am, still am a sinner. By his mercy, he had shown me, given me a new pair of eyes.

The Mutated CAT

YOU WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT I AM THINKING

I am a cat, a mutated cat which was once a human origin. Today, my genes have evolved differently. Today, my genes had been mutated by the polluted world.

The kind of world I live in, I vomit blood, I shed blood and I suffer anemia. I am drained out of blood. I have no fear of losing my soul now, not to say death. What is death! I come with nothing, I go with NOTHING!

I can be sleeping, but my brain is working all the time. I can be purring and I can be miaoing the whole day, you don't know what I want! All you see is I am just a weak freak.



You know who you are. I forgive, I got it. I abide the rules of the game. Did YOU? Or did you not know the rules of the game? Yet do you know how to pronounce and declare the name, the sacred name, the holy name spelled G-O-D!!!



What is God? Who is your real God? A god that you worship, and ask you to commit adultery? Where is your husband? Where is your wife? God will help you or God had helped me? You know the answer now, or is the game not complete yet? Or are you still waiting?

If I have any fear of YOU, I WILL NOT BE CALLED A CAT, A MUTATED CAT!!!!

My First Unknown Relationship

Nice Words, Sweet Talk Not For Me
It is so hard to say, especially when I am not a person who can speak nice words. However, I am capable of telling the truth, I am able to tell, with simple words. Yes, hard to believe, and I can never dream of. But I believe it is, and there is. It is a wonder, a mystery and a miracle. Everything is happening for a reason and everything leading to something meaningful and for me to find out and learn.

Origin...
It all started, not only with the Prophet, but all accumulative, every single things that happened day in and day out.

Pictorial Jesus, Jesus on the cross -- St Francis of Assisi Church I visualized, imagined.
A person who have no idea of what is God, a person who only know people cannot be trusted, and a person who know that Life is so much of suffering and a question mark to its meaning, I only know that I prayed to Jesus for help. I prayed to Jesus, for peace -- family and world (if the world is no peace, how can my parents be at peace -- when there is a war? I prayed to Jesus for protection, not to protect me, but protect my parents, especially my mother, the person whom I love, the person whom I worried and the person whom I saw, suffering and full of sorrow in her life.

Money Sick, No Peace In Family
Who can I turn to for help? Nobody knows what I am thinking. My father and my sister seem not to get along well. My brothers, both have their own problems last time. Money is always a problem, from then till now. Everyday I heard about "earning money" and everyday I heard about the problems of "women". These two problems is already a great issue in family.


Not a Sudden Idea -- It Started when I know how to read...
So my relationship with Jesus actually begin as early as when I was young, capable of 'speaking' to Jesus. I supposed that is during my Primary School time. I learned bits of Jesus in catechism class. Back home, I read my brother's 'bible' -- actually, the story of Jesus. My big brother was very good to me. He doted on me, he bought story books for me and there was once, he bought a story book about Moses and baby Jesus (I forget the title of the story book, but I can still remember the page. It was baby Moses, and there was a page on Noah's Ark with all the different animals on it. I love my big brother. My second brother taught me in my studies. I think childhood days are really the best days, even though they are not really luxurious life nor bed of roses.

I Valued Relationships
Relationship is very important to me. I was not aware of it, but Mr Wong told me. Yes, it must be. But how to have a relationship with God, something which I do not even know and something which I do not even see? Someone told me, "You seem to be searching for something." Am I? Yes, and I seem to know my purpose soon, though it is quite apparent now, but still, that is me.... hard to say, difficult to put everything down in black and white.

My Dreams = My relationship with God
Relationship is another keyword which is brought to my attention today. I was enlightened by the power of words. I begin to learn about importance of Beliefs and next, existence of Spirits and next, the definition of Life. Step by step, scary, but awesome and miraculous. I rejoice, I am grateful and I am glad, my prayers have never failed me. (Not for striking 4Ds, not for making me rich, not for helping me earn lots of money, but for protection, for guiding, for wisdom and for family's bliss -- my parents, my brothers and sisters, my nieces and nephews, my husband and my children).

My Mission, My Vision, all Walking Towards Light
It is an irony of life, which I am going to continue, lots of it going to be mentioned, have to. It is not so simple to be explained in just one post. Imagine how long do I take to have my eyes opened and how long do I take to see. One person, and perhaps even more, do not believe me. One person, wrote to me and said I am making my own 'promotion', I am not going to be deterred by that. Time will tell. How can I possibly make up so much stories? How can I possibly make up such downgraded stories and be a mockery perhaps? Whatever, I have no fear of being a ridicule, but I am proud. Proud that I am brave and proud that I have the guts to be transparent and have nothing to hide. I can walk around with pride because I have found Light that is going to lead me the Path of Light.

Life Refreshed, New Vision, New Life, New Beginning
I never regret anything now. Not a single thing. Not even blaming anyone, not even caring about tons of loans. Sick and immune, too heavy to carry, tired, totally tired. I can no longer carry. I want to rest, put down the loans on the floor for a while. Let me regain my energy to carry the pails of water later. When I can sing along Songs of God, "Blessed be God, Blessed Be God, Blessed Be God, Forever Amen...", that would make my burden lighter -- focused my mind on the song and I can carry the burden with enjoyment instead! What's more, when I die, I have no loans. When I die, I want to see my love ones happy, I want to see them suffer no more.


In every adversity there lies the seed of an equivalent advantage. In every defeat is a lesson showing you how to win the victory next time. ~ Robert Collier


Peace Inspire, Peace Motivate, Only when there is Peace Inspiration
I have lots of things to do. Not that I am very free to create blogs here (Misconceptions I must correct, made by so many people.) I started YrManna.com and until now, I have not really 'started it'. The time will come, that just got to show how long it can take for me to accomplish something. It takes so long, because I am not a robot. I am make of flesh and blood. I suffer pain and aches. No matter how much my spirit is, my heart desire, if my body cannot coordinate with my heart and soul, nothing can be done.

Believe, Don't Believe, I shall do my part
If one person has doubt in me, this shows that there are doubts elsewhere. I am a consumer myself. I understand. However, I accept people who still have doubts and still do not believe. Adversity. I will tell you about this word next time. It is 2.57am now. I need to off the computer now. I do not want to become a panda. But I tell you, I am not going to stop talking about God, the almighty and powerful creator of life, the giver of life and our natural Father, the one who really love us, no Him, no us. I am glad, He Believes -- at least, it starts.